"I know what whole foods are, and I've seen people buying them. I would too, but I'm too busy to be choosy – my vegetable intake comes in the form of: Ketchup – "tomatoes" and French Fries – "potatoes." Salad is found in EVERY cheeseburger I eat: it's that green-ish color in the middle of the burger. Fruit? Easy, it's the garnish on my cocktail, (usually an orange). I have cut back on red meat... and know I should only buy organic, free range, hand massaged meats and vegetables raised by people who smell like patchouli oil, but where do they even sell that stuff?"